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Who are 'Your People'?


Soul Family
Amazing to find your Soul Family in the journey of life

I have always loved celebrating the wins of loved ones. It is great to witness when people’s hopes and dreams come true. 

Nowadays though, when people who are dear to my heart pass tests, get promoted, succeed or simply ‘win’ I extend my congratulations to them in a slightly unusual way.  

I prefer describing this as ‘a truthful and balanced way’. 


🌞 A little while back a very dear friend got promoted. I was so happy for them. They are a wonderful human with an amazing work ethic and they deserved that promotion. 

To celebrate, my friend offered to take a bunch of us out for dinner. What a lovely, generous gesture. 

A couple of days later, when we were discussing the details of the dinner over the phone, I told them I loved and valued them always- even if they were ‘demoted’. 

I wanted my friend to know that. Particularly because of a few hardships they previously went through. Of course the type of person you are speaking with and the timing are very important when sharing such sentiments. 

My friend really appreciated it. And we had an emotional moment on each end of the receiver.


🌞 I have been applying the same strategy to my relationships with the amazing children in my life. After celebrating their win, when the time is right, I will always say. “I want you to know that I am super happy you have succeeded. You wanted this so much and made every effort to get it. But I also want you to know you are worthy whether you win or lose. You are loved, appreciated and valued- regardless. And I am always here for you.”

 

⛅ When we are down, and we are losing according to some societal standard, we know the people who love us believe we will rise again. And they will support us in any way they can. 

I believe applying the same thinking to when we ‘win’ is fair and balanced. 


⛅ People who love and accept us ‘wholly’ with our victories and falls, with our light or shadow sides would be by our side, regardless.


🗒 So here are three lists you can make, in order to identify the different types of people who support you:


Your People are the ones who are 'always' there for you

Make a list of the people who are by your side when you 'WIN'. 

Good to have people who believe in you and want to see you flourish. But also be aware that there may be a few on that list with fragile self-esteem or who lack self-worth. Therefore, they themselves always need to win or be ‘associated with’ winners to feel worthy. 


List the people who are by your side when you 'LOSE'.

Many of these people will care about you dearly. But be aware of the few who only can be around others when they lose, because they have the constant need to feel 'better than'. 

To be the better one!


💎 Jot down the names of the people who are ALWAYS by your side, regardless of your circumstances.

I don’t mean the people who are there because they feel they must be, due to family ties etc... And because they want to be accepted by a group for their support.  But the people who ‘want to’ be there.

These are the people who deeply care about you and do not abide by a win-lose model of life. They possibly see both as learning. They tend to be wise, tend to have a balanced view of life, of themselves and others. 

They are people you have a deep connection with and they 'get' you!

This third list, is the list of ‘Your People’!


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